"I'm Weird" - Breastfeeding

Tonight, I've got so many thoughts bouncing around in my head and I'm feeling very much like I need to dust off my soapbox on several topics. It's hard to focus on ONE topic, but I'm going to do my best to do so.

The first installment of my "I'm Weird" series, I'm going to focus on Breastfeeding.

Of course we all know that Breast is Best. It's what mankind has been doing since the beginning of time. If it wasn't "best", we would have died off a LONG time ago. I understand that some women and some babies have difficulties getting started and maintaining a successful nursing relationship. What I have a problem with is the mom who doesn't even TRY. The woman who doesn't want to breastfeed because it will restrict their social life. The woman who doesn't breastfeed because their partner thinks her breasts are "his toys". As a mother, the health of your child comes first. PERIOD!

Craz-E and I had a hard time getting started. We were separated for a good 6 hours after he was born while he was in the NICU due to the trauma of his birth. Then the annoying midwives at the hospital were anything BUT helpful when he was brought back to me. So it was about 12 hours before we even had a first attempt at breastfeeding. But we stuck it out. I had terrific support from the community midwives and eventually we figured it out. I could have very easily given up several times in that first week. But I refused to give up, give in or throw in the towel. I knew once we got the hang of it, breastfeeding was going to be the best option for my child. He was jaundice, I called him my Little Yellow Monkey. Even before I started doing all my "crunchy" research, something in my new Mommy Brain told me that everything would be fine once he got the hang of the natural way to eat.

Yes, breastfeeding made it so that I couldn't leave my baby with a babysitter for more then a few hours at a time. But honestly, I didn't really WANT to leave my first child with anyone for the first year of his life. Hub and I had a few dates without him, but for the most part we accepted that our new roll was that of Mom and Dad. There would be plenty of time in our lives to be Husband and Wife, this first year of Craz-E's life was important and we could never go back and do it again.

The reason I felt the need for my soapbox tonight on this subject is the concept of Feeding On Demand verses Parent Directed Feeding.

I had an experience this weekend that knotted my stomach and had me worrying for hours afterwards. I discovered a new first-time mom (and dad) who had their 3 month old baby on a feeding schedule. She nurses every 4-6 hours - 6am, 10am, 2pm, 6pm and then not again until midnight and then the schedule repeats. The baby is TINY - under 5th percentile!

All I could think was they were starving this poor tiny baby. When she would cry or fuss, they'd stick a paci in her mouth. I only saw her for a couple hours (between scheduled feedings) and she was sleeping through most of the time but towards the end of her visit, she did start to fuss. The reports I got from those who've spent more time with them is that the baby cries and fusses all the time. Well of course she does! She's HUNGRY!

The idea behind Feeding On Demand is to respond to your babies basic needs when they need it. By putting a new baby on a feeding schedule, you're telling that baby "It doesn't matter what you think you need. I'm the adult and I know better." But that's kind of ridiculous. Would you expect that your husband would know when you are hungry better then you would? Of course not. It's your stomach and your body. You eat when your body says it's getting low on resources. So by putting a baby on a schedule, you're teaching that child that what they feel doesn't matter.

And really, how can you think that a baby, who's whole purpose in life at this point is to GROW, would get all they need to eat in 4-5 "meals" a day? As adults, we tend to eat at least 4-5 times a day - breakfast, morning snack/coffee break, lunch, afternoon snack, dinner and sometimes dessert. And we're not trying to grow! We also drink throughtout the day. But a baby on a schedule is expected to only eat/drink 5 times? What about during growth spurts when they need extra calories? On a schedule, you don't know to provide the extra feedings for them to get those extra calories.

If you want a "professional opinion" with more eloquently stated facts and information, Peaceful Parenting has a very nice article.